raving matilda

Although I liked last night’s post, and it really expressed what I was feeling at the time, it’s also important to me to acknowledge the extent to which many of the problems I focus on are first-world problems. My angst would be meaningless in a subsistence economy. But it’s reality as I see and experience it. It’s funny because many of the posts are pretty dour (not that I feel I need to apologize for that, as I’ve discussed), but I’m not sure they paint an accurate portrait of me. It’s just that this blog has become a fantastic opportunity to rant, so I usually feel way better after a post than before. That sometimes makes the posts seem kind of silly after I’ve written them. It all makes me think of a line somebody had on his blog in the “about me” section; all he had written was, “What can you say about yourself that isn’t a lie?”

Anyway, for my friends who read this regularly, it’s worth saying that I’m actually feeling better than I have in ages, even if I use this outlet for my anxieties and frustrations. It’s been a goal to write every day for a long time, one I didn’t really think I’d achieve until I retired. I’ve also been exercising every day, and saving more guilty pleasures exclusively for the weekend. It’s likely this won’t be sustained, it usually isn’t, but having more energy has been fun and useful.

One thing I’ve been trying lately, with help from a friend, is trance music (sorry DNA, it was just too soon in Carolina, the time is now). For some reason, the more downtempo stuff I used to like (e.g., acid jazz) has just lost my interest. I wonder if I was downloading music again, and not just picking random stuff out of the used CD rack, if I’d rekindle my interest in downtempo. But I’ve really had a thing for dancey (trademark on this new word) music lately.

For me, a really good trance song makes me want to obey it. I don’t even really know what that means, I just know when I’m into a trance song I have an urge that my brain describes to me as obedience. It’s one of the things that make me sad that trance (and electronica in general) doesn’t have more socially conscious lyrics, because if others are like me, they’re ready to follow trance wherever it leads. But I suppose dance music for generations has been about escape, so chanting “Free Mumia” to a Tiesto song just wouldn’t cut mustard.

Thinking about this tonight reminded me of a fantasy I’ve had for a long time. When I hear a good trance song, one that makes me want to obey, I like to imagine what it would be like if that was the national anthem. In fact, I think this would make a fantastic trance video. If you have some trance music, put on a really good track and imagine the following video accompanying it. If you don’t have trance, put on whatever you have that’s kind of hardcore and upbeat and imagine it. Seriously, I think it will be fun.

It begins with the end of some kind of Olympic event – let’s say the 100 m hurdles. No music is playing yet. They assemble at the podium, the medals are hung around the necks, and the full stadium is asked to rise for the national anthem. The anthem, of course, is the song that you should now press play on. At first, everybody plays it totally straight. They start standing respectfully for the anthem. After a while, though, there’s a shot of the bronze medal winner’s foot starting to tap in time with the music. Cut to the silver medal winner, who is slowly nodding in time. Of course, the rest is a continued gradual progression – the gold medal winner starts swaying, then breaks into a full-on groove, the people around the podium holding flowers start breakdancing, the camera cuts to the crowd who are now just in full-on rave mode. It continues like this until the song ends, when the camera cuts back to the podium and everyone’s just standing there respectfully again. They walk off, with the medal winners waving to the crowd, and it’s never quite clear if the dance scene was real or imagined.